Quarantine

Don’t get too excited, now.

I know it’s been over a year – it looks like a year and about 4 months, to be precise – since I last posted. But these are unusual circumstances. It was either write a long Facebook post (which for some reason I was trying to do on my phone, because I’m so smart now that I’m getting older), or dust off this lovely wordpress site. I wish I knew how many hours I have spent putting together my thoughts for this blog – or just how thick a book it would be if all these posts were to be printed.

But this is not a trip down memory lane, Sarah. It’s a chance to air out some musings from this week.

Again – don’t get too excited. This won’t be deep or profound, just thoughts of my present life that want to go somewhere.

To catch you up to speed – that coronavirus, yeah? The new one, that’s making everyone really, really freak out?

On February 29, it made a really fast jump from being news articles about China to being right in our backyard. I came to the parents’ home for the weekend, as I normally do, and my oldest brother came over to join us around Saturday lunch.

My parents live about an hour east of Seattle, in the Cascade foothills with a beautiful view of the valley, distant mountains, and Mt. Rainier itself on a benevolent day. It is remote here, 15 minutes from the nearest town, which is just how my family likes it. My brothers and I have flown this nest and now live in suburbs much closer to the hustle of Seattle.  Whenever we can, we gather over the weekend and enjoy simple things like meals and games together. The thing I notice and appreciate most at the parents’, that I took for granted as a child, is the quiet. No sound of traffic except, perhaps, a train in the distance – the highway is replaced with birds and the wind. Step outside on a clear night, and you’ll look up to find not city smog, but constellations that are wonderfully, glittering crisp in the dark.

I know, I’m waxing poetic.

So exactly 7 days ago, my brother joined us for lunch. We chatted about how his work has been lately – he’s a nurse at a medical facility – and the discussion moved on to the latest coronavirus news. I knew the first death in Washington state had been reported that morning, but did not know anything more than that. Our mom began to look up news articles and discovered the death and a growing number of local COVID-19 cases were connected to my brother’s own workplace.

At first, our only response was astonishment. But as we continued to talk and research and process, the implications of that connection began to sink in. It was very likely my brother had interacted with this case during his work week. The possibility that he could be infected, and therefore we could now be infected, couldn’t be taken lightly. Something that had been overseas was suddenly in our backyard, and potentially in our house.

For the rest of the weekend, the news blew up with stories and constantly-updating numbers, and we took it all in as fast as it was being released. We started looking into information about symptoms and incubation time, and found a lot of different answers and a lot of “we’re-not-quite-sure-yet.” The incubation time before someone with the virus showed symptoms was usually listed as 2-14 days, with a median time of 5-7 days. But then there were accounts of people that did not even show symptoms, and yet tested positive for the virus. Were you contagious if you didn’t show symptoms? How long could the virus last on surfaces?

With all the unknowns. my family knew we wanted to do what would be best for our friends, our community, and the bigger picture of this global outbreak. But exactly what that best move looks like has involved ongoing, difficult choices. I know many in a similar situation have had a mandatory 14-day quarantine, and have even been housed at hotels or other facilities. Yet my family had no hope of being tested to know for certain if we were infected… even my brother, who returned to working on the frontlines of this crisis on Monday, has had no chance of being tested so far.

First, we decided we would stay home from church on Sunday. Then, my mom made calls and found volunteers willing to step in and help with the food bank she has faithfully run every Monday. My weekend at the parents’ turned into a week at the parents’. I rotated the few outfits I had brought and worked remotely the best I could – trying to follow an important work meeting on Friday despite Skype lags, and keeping a list of what I will need to catch up on when I can return to my physical desk and see my co-workers again. My younger brother never returned to his college apartment, but has been completing school tests and assignments from home.

We’ve had discussions on what is safe – could we make a grocery run if we use hand wipes, go at midnight when there are less people, and use self-checkout? Could my dad continue his tennis club visits, if he only uses the ball machine? Events that were scheduled long ago have been re-scheduled, events that were routine have been missed. It hasn’t been as simple as signing up to a 14-day quarantine, but we have felt the daily sacrifice as we have to give up each commitment and plan, one at a time.

I don’t mean to seem dramatic – I just think there is value in sharing what we are experiencing. Whether it resonates for those in a similar situation or educates for those that have not yet been impacted by this virus, I think there is always good in sharing our own story.

And it does feel a bit ridiculous, and unreal. We don’t even know if this invisible virus (ok, to be technically correct – invisible to the naked eye) is fiendishly waiting until day 14 to show itself, or if it is present but we’ll never know, or if my brother was never infected and we’re just 4 normal & healthy people that canceled our lives to avoid the rest of the world for two weeks. There is no way of knowing (no way currently available to us) what we have and if we would spread it to others.

It’s all a lot of maybe and what-if right now. But we can’t chance it.

I find it interesting that the day this all happened, when the quarantine began because we could no longer in good conscience see other people, my Facebook reminded me of a 2016 post where I had shared this quote:

“Cowardice asks the question, is it safe?

Expediency ask the question, is it politic?

Vanity asks the question, is it popular?

But conscience ask the question, is it right?

And there comes a time when we must take a position that is neither safe, nor politic, nor popular, but one must take it because it is right.”

-Martin Luther King Jr.

 

In some ways, this feels extreme. In some ways, it feels unreal. Yet I want to look back at this time knowing my family made the best choices we could, for others.

Ah goodness, it has gotten so late. There is more I want to say, and maybe I will write down more later. If I had time I would end with inspirational & insightful bits about this whole situation. But it’s all right, if you are on social media I think you’re already getting absolutely every angle – panicked, inspirational, humorous and everything in-between. What a time. Thanks for joining me at the old stomping grounds for a bit!

 

Sarah

Live Life.

The mass of men live lives of quiet desperation…

Thoreau

 

—-

Alas for those that never sing,

But die with all their music in them….

Oliver Wendall Holmes

 

 

 

 

 

 

The other night at Red Robin I was slinging trash bags into the dumpster after a busy holiday rush of people. A line cook standing nearby with his electronic cigarette looked up to the sky and, with a shake of his head and an exhalation of smoke, commented that he hated his job.

Not an unusual comment. Not many working at Red Robin really want to be there. No one comes in overflowing with enthusiasm for starting their shift – rather, the first words out of their mouth after clocking in are usually “I don’t want to be here.” The only motivation keeping them there is the desire to earn money. When I asked that line cook what he would want to do, if he could do anything, he just shrugged and replied ‘some job that pays a lot of money’.

People pursue good grades, so they can pursue a degree, so they can pursue a career, so they can pursue money, so they can buy lots of things… ? What for? A handful of wind.

Never forget that you are not stuck where you are. There is always, always more to life than your surroundings. Don’t accept the ruts.

In this life there are things beautiful and things terrible. Heart-lifting things and sob-wrenching things.

There are times to mourn and cry, but don’t let those times rob you of the seasons of joy and sowing and growth. Don’t let the worries and anxieties steal your joy. I know Jesus said to worry sometimes but… oh wait… Well, in life there is a season for worry… that is… hmm…

You know all of the things I could tell you. Live a life unfettered. Hold nothing back. Adventure is out there, et cetera, et cetera. All you have to do is go read some inspirational graduation speech or find some lifting quotes with grand scenery on Pinterest. I don’t need to add to that clamor

Just please, please, don’t remain in the rut. Don’t be a grazing sheep, always looking down – lift your head. Don’t quench your passions.

Live life.

And yes, all of these pictures are from the newly released “The Secret Life of Walter Mitty.” I highly recommend the movie, if only for the gorgeous scenery.

Watterson’s Words

It’s pretty much a universally acknowledged fact that Bill Watterson is a genius. This article only proves that all the more: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/08/29/bill-watterson-advice-to-college-grads-illustrated-like-calvin-and-hobbes_n_3837271.html

Two Birds…that is Two Kittens…BOTH//Blessings and Cuteness

I’ve decided that my life looks kinda like this ->

Like the trajectory – what I’m aiming for – is continually changing, but if it weren’t for the trajectories I had in the past, I wouldn’t be on the path I am now. Even though a bunch of imaginings never became flesh, such as College of the Ozarks and doing the PCT on horses, having those ideas helped me to decide what I DID want to do, and brought me to wonderful adventures such as the Tetons (ah, still so planted in my heart!) and Ecola!

Well lately my flight path as I’ve flapped out of the nest of Ecola (ah I amuse myself) has looked like this: Ah, I am set forth into the work world once again! I know, I will get a job housecleaning (good pay) and start working right away! *Checks Craigslist*… Hmmm maybe I should actually work in the food industry. Again. Even better pay. Panera? Red Robin? Bellevue? Redmond? 

Over the last three weeks I have had at least seven job interviews, giving me plenty of practicing in wearing in too-tight dress shoes and trying not to feel like a kid playing dress-up… fortunately with my busing experience from last summer my resume looks a lot better, and the job industry is a bit more lively and welcoming than several years ago. And thanks to that one guest that once upon a breakfast angrily shook an empty coffee mug, I have sparkling answers to “Have you ever dealt with bad customers?” and other interview questions.

I was offered a job at Panera. The people I met were nice, the pay would be minimum (not bad in WA!), and I was going to start training on Saturday. Then came Thursday. I had an interview at my 3rd Red Robin location – the closest job to home I had interviewed for yet. The interview went awesome. The man (the server manager) really seemed to like me. Only problem was the general manager also had to meet me, and he wasn’t free until Monday… which was after I would start training at Panera. And I didn’t want Panera to start pouring money and training into me and then – Adios! – a few days later. So I had to make the choice between… a for-sure job at Panera or… the possibility of a job at Red Robin. It was the whole “bird in the hand or two birds in the bush?’ scenario. I hardly saw anything when I was driving around that day, I was so glazed over and turmoiled (wow, apparently ‘turmoiled’ is not an actual word. Well in my dictionary ’tis…). What to do, what to do? I didn’t know what the right choice was or if there was a right choice or if I even had to make a choice.

I dropped the job at Panera. And held my breath ’til Monday.

And I got the Red Robin job! 🙂

I start as a busser/host and will hopefully be able to move up to server before the end of this summer. Woot woot!

It’s been eight months since I last worked, hopefully I can remember how, ha ha! 😉

God as usual is so gracious to me. This job is close to home and in a town where one of my close friends live, so I can visit her. This job will also pay well since I will get minimum wage + tips, which will help me to save up for whatever is next.

~

On a completely different subject, we have KITTENS! I feel very sorry for all the other Ecolites who did not return home to find little furry bundles of cuteness living in a box on their porch.

We let them inside for a long time today and one actually settled down for a while and curled up on my lap.

 

But mostly they wobbled across the floor looking cute.

 

 

 

“Oh, hello. Why yes, I am completely adorable.”

“Please, pick me up and hold me,” it is saying.

Oh but you can’t. How sad.

I’ll just have to extra-enjoy these balls of fur with tails for you! 🙂

 

To the Dregs

There are only 4 weeks left of Ecola – FOUR!!! Ack, how crazy is that!

I should have been posting more blog posts during the school year because I was learning so much it would have been easy to pass on bits now and then… but I was so busy processing it myself – and hanging out with my fellow students (that is, busy with this crazy thing called “living life”) – I just didn’t have time!

The speakers’ names and faces are starting to blur together, as much I don’t want them to. My mind’s pretty full. And I am looking forward to taking this head knowledge and living it out. Being here I have realized more the lack of Christians in the world that are truly living out their faith with boldness and openness, and it has greatly strengthened my resolve to reflect Christ. So I’m looking forward to leaving school so I can put into practice all I’ve learned… although I would not be adverse to coming back for the 2nd year program. 🙂 But right now that’s not in the plans.

Over 2/3rds of the students here applied for 2nd year, which means they have to turn down over 1/3 of the applicants…! The acceptance/rejection letters have been trickling in and it has been a joy and a sorrow to watch… My heart aches for those that do not get in. It is certainly a test of their faith that God knows best where their future should go.

And for me? I am looking forward to spending my first summer at home since I graduated. Over the last couple years when I’m home, my friends are gone, and when I’m gone, my friends are home! And my younger brothers are growing up, testing out their wings and poking their little toes out of the nest as they test the cold, scary waters of this whirlpool world! Ha ha! 😉 So I am looking forward to spending time with friends and family, hopefully working and earning a whole ‘eap ‘o money so I can spend it on something great like traveling… and more traveling… 🙂

There are a couple ideas/suggestions of what I could spend my summer but nothing definite I can share, I’m waiting on God’s confirmation. But I know it’ll be good!

Photos of the Alaska trip are coming soon!

To Turn a Page Anew

Stole the title from my friend’s poem. 🙂 Here’s my ‘version’ of that poem, for right now:

To turn a page anew,

Is a scary thing to do

Sometimes.

But other times…

It is very easy and exciting.

Fin.

Like it? 😀 My poetry is award-winning. No seriously, it is.

The news of the day is that it’s official… I have switched contracts with a fellow busser, and will be leaving the Tetons 2 weeks earlier. September 16th is my last day, I believe. Which means I have about 28 more days left!! This switch will give me a little more time to be home before heading to Ecola in October.

*Insert generic picture of person leaping in front of a clearly photo-shopped sky*

I wish I could say I am very sad and not ready to leave yet – but truth is I have been here for 3 months. I have made friends and I have had a great time. I will continue to have a fantastic time for the next four weeks. And then I get to see my family and go to school to learn about God in Oregon and then there’s Thanksgiving and Christmas and more family and friends I have not seen in too long… can you sense my mild excitement???

Every day and experience is a blessing from God. I am content with being here now, and I will savor this page I am living right this moment. But I am super excited for what’s to come, too…!

 

 

Another Season…

On Friday I have my last day of work, and on Saturday I will be packed and out of here! I don’t feel too sad about leaving, I must say, because 1) I have been here for more than 4 months now ;), 2) Most of my friends are already gone, and 3) I am excited for what new things God will bring in the near future. October is rather chock-full of events, including a drive to Boise, a concert, a job interview (and possibly job training), house-sitting, and the Women of Faith conference.  Whew! Where shall I find time for the important things such as Psych and Zoo Tycoon, I ask you? 😉

Looking back it’s amazing to think of how many people I’ve meet and all the different things I’ve done with my new friends – camping, hiking, pouring ice down each other’s shirts ;), games, Bible study, s’mores… it’s been a most excellent summer.

Look at the difference of the Tatoosh Range since May:

May 24th

June 3rd

August 12th

 As well as the change in Mt Rainier:

June 3rd

September 5th

September 9th

September 20th - after it snowed again on the summit.

The end has been coming for a while – people have been leaving since the beginning of September, slowly returning to other jobs, home, or school. It’s been rather sad. 😦 My roommate left just this morning. We were lucky to be paired together and had some marvelous, fun times. 🙂

Now my room is empty, like when I first arrived. I started packing tonight (to Christmas music!) and it felt rather good – probably more because I was cleaning a room that had stayed rather messy for more than 4 months. 😉 I’ve wiped down the drawers, vacuumed, and have a final load of clothes in the washer now.

Yes, it is finally the end.

Well I would love to share pictures and memories all day, but the truth is tomorrow (now today) is one of my last days of work, and it is late, and I must get to bed. My memories are in my blog posts, and on my Facebook, and in my camera, and in my diary, and – of course – ingrained in my mind, for me to smile at as I remember the wonderful times I have had with my new friends on the mountain.

More adventures to come!

-Sarah

p.s. And yes, Mom, I realize how late it is, and yes, I am going to bed right now. 🙂

It’s Time for Healing

For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.

~ 2 Timothy 1:7

It has now been one year since August 13th, 2010, the day I flipped the car into a steep ditch going 55 mph, my dad went to the hospital, and we ended up returning home with minimal injuries. (See story and pictures here). I had a couple bruises, my dad got a small concussion and was sore for several months. Considering what had happened and how the car looked in the end – we were blessed. It truly is a miracle that both of us are alive today. How all of the small things happened – when my dad touched the wheel, where we landed, what season it was, etc – all of these point to God’s protection over the incident.

It was a big event in my life, so I guess it’s not that surprising that it’s still on my mind. A lot. But more and more I’m realizing that it’s not on my mind in a good way. If I just stand on the side of the road and watch traffic roll by, I watch every car as they merge and slow and turn. I get stressed because for some reason, it’s like I feel that if I concentrate and watch, it helps somehow… Same thing with riding in a car – I obsessively watch the driver and what they’re doing and if they’re paying attention to the road, and will “back seat drive” – just telling them when a light’s green… or turning to check when they’re merging even though they’re checking themselves… It doesn’t matter if the driver is paying attention and all, I still get needlessly stressed. Some people live vicariously? I guess you could say I drive vicariously.  But not in a good way.

That’s one side of my bad… “habits”… since the car crash. The other side is my guilt.

There’s no getting around it – we crashed because of me. It was my fault. I was surprised after the accident, because my dad and even my mom, who wasn’t anywhere near at the time, were naming things they shouldn’t have or could have done so that the accident could have been avoided. I couldn’t believe it – it’s like when parents get divorced and the child blames himself – there’s no logical reason behind it. The car crash was my own, stupid fault.

This has haunted me… well, for a year now. Any little mistake I make when driving, the small things that everyone does – forgetting to put on your blinker one time or so – add up in my mind. Like marks against me, evidence of how I’m a terrible driver and thus a failure of a person, inadequate. I enjoy driving, but my memories of the accident combine with my overactive imagination, and make any time in or near cars dreadful. My friends will joke around while they’re driving, and all I can think is, “One glance away from the road and…”

It’s true that driving is dangerous. It’s super dangerous – I’m amazed that there aren’t more accidents every day. But I’ve allowed what should have been a healthy fear to grow into a paralyzing fear, and it’s time for that to stop.

They say the first step to healing is awareness of the problem, and lately I’ve been becoming more aware of my problem everyday. I think I’ve always known I’ve been laying too much guilt and thus paranoia on myself, but I didn’t want to stop beating myself up… after all, I’ve got plenty of reason to berate myself. But I think through my self-torment, I’m choosing to walk on Satan’s path and listen to his lies, and withholding deserved glory from God. I’m choosing to chain myself and live in fear, and to focus on my own guilt instead of what God did for me that day a year ago now.

He saved the lives of me and my father – and of the people in the oncoming car! If my mistake had caused my father or others permanent damage or death – as it very easily could have – I don’t know… how I could keep living and stay sane. How can any human being live with that??? I couldn’t. Yet by God’s power and goodness, none of the terrible things that could have come about that day, did. I went back to work the next day. Instead of life halting abruptly from the creation of a gaping hole, caused by one or two lives ended, or bodies changed irrevocably, we all came home safely and life went on. What a miracle!

And to echo the words of one of my friends, God has already forgiven me – who am I to think my opinion is above God’s?

It’s been a long time coming, but through God’s guidance I’m realizing that there needs to be healing in this area of my life. It’s time for this wound to stop festering and heal. It’s time for me to take my eyes off of my sorry self (to end the pity party!), to turn to God and thus find freedom and the lifting of my soul.

I choose for August 13th, 2010, to be a story of God’s goodness, and not a story of my failure. Instead of focusing on my guilt, I want to focus on God’s proven protection and love. I’m thankful that He continues to bring good things out of that terrible time, and to teach me lessons through what happened.

I tell these things not to bring attention to myself, but to bring encouragement to you and glory to God. May you choose to focus on the right things, and find freedom in doing so. 🙂

Life is Wonderful

I don’t think there’s been a day since coming here that I haven’t thought that. (I think there’s a movie back home I’ve been meaning to watch by that name…)

Far from giving me ideas for school and a career, my list of countries and things I want to see in this world is growing as I listen to stories upon stories from people who have been everywhere, worked everywhere, seen many crazy things. My wanderlust is growing and itching. 🙂

This week alone was fantabulous, consisting of a 14 mile hike on Monday (with Pride & Prejudice afterwards), trip to town and experiencing Sushi Land for the first time on Tuesday, …..work… for 3 days, and tomorrow a busy day at work, with the end reward being a ride home to enjoy the weekend (and a friend’s wedding!!!).

How fantastic is that??

Life is not completely wonderful, but sometimes it feels like it. And this is one of those times.

Stay tuned for another blog post.

Sarah

Pea Soup Fog and Periwinkle Sky Days

Following is a blog post containing random spurts of thoughts from Sarah’s mind, intended to be an update on all going-ons at Mount Rainier for the last several days, and full of trivial details which the reader is not obligated to find important…

Hello all. 🙂

The weather seems to be following a general pattern of several days of pea-soup fog, followed by several days of pure blue skies that outline the mountains beautifully.

The webcam for today - oh just look at that beautiful mountain! 😉

I feel sorry for the visitors that come during the former type of days – one woman joked to me that she had determined Mount Rainier was a hoax and we made it all up. It is amazing how the mountain can completely disappear – even when the Tatoosh Range in the south is visible. If I could make the weather clear for every visitor,  I would!

I think my favorite “mood” for the mountain is not when it’s invisible (obviously) or even when it’s silhouetted against a periwinkle sky (oooh look I must be feeling poetic, just used periwinkle in lieu of blue. XD), but when there are several clouds around it… in that instance I feel like there should be dramatic orchestra music playing… and a helicopter taking a sweeping air shot… 🙂 Ha ha, just kidding. But really that’s the time when I think the mountain is at its most glorious. Next time I will attempt to capture in a picture, to show you what I mean.

My week of work ended up being extended, and I worked Sunday, which is normally my day off. Both Saturday and Sunday were gorgeous, which meant excellent news for visitors and the cafe business, but 7+ hours of non-stop rushing around and endless dishes for us employees. I cashiered all of Saturday and some of Sunday and have developed a good steady rhythm – although sometimes I feel like a robot saying the same script to every customer.

“Is that everything? Total is $12.88. Thank you. Please sign. Do you want your receipt? Thank you.”

At first it was strange being switched to cashier instead of being behind the line, but now I rather like it. (I’ve grown attached to my register, ha ha). And it’s always a good feeling at the end of the day, especially a busy day, when the cash balances or comes pennies close.

Here’s my list of what I love/dislike in the customers (I’ll come back and add more as I think of them…):

Love:

• All of the different accents, of course! 🙂
• The foreigners that don’t know the currency, and hold out a handful of coins, or even a wad of bills, and I just take out what I need. (The other day I got to use the few words of spanish I knew, telling some Mexicans that the quarter was worth “veinte-cinco” cents, “de nada” to their gracias. The boy asked “Where is the… and made a sucking sound,” and I pointed to the straws. “How did you say that?” he asked and I repeated the word straw. 🙂 Just very fun to teach English to those that want to learn.)
• When they just use my name (from my nametag) as though they know me and are good friends with me.
• When they tell me to keep the change. 😉

Dislike:

• When I ask “Is that everything?” and they reply “Yes… and four sodas and a hot chocolate.”  ….
• When I put up the chairs to close off a section… and they pass right by the tables that are still open and take down the chairs to sit in the “closed” section… so I can’t sweep and mop until they leave… grrr
• How they don’t understand when pizza is two for one. “Ohh, two slices for one dollar?” Yeah, you wish. XD

The good part about working on Sunday when I normally wouldn’t, is that my next work week is shorter. I have Monday and Tuesday off, and leave around noon on Saturday to go home for several days. My birthday is in a week and I’m using it as an excuse to take a slightly longer weekend – I’ll get to spend 2 days at home. 🙂 I’m so excited!!

My time off today was so exceedingly boring, you would fall asleep on your computer just reading about it. The fog was too thick to go hiking. Tomorrow I’m hoping it will be clearer, as it will be the first day my roommate and I have the same day off. 🙂 We’re planning on hiking to the top of Pinnacle Peak.

I have now run out of witty and amusing things to say – oh wait, I never did have any :0)… so I’ll sign off.

That’s all, folks!

Sarah